Introduction
We have all felt it. We have all been thinking about it. The, in some cases, harmful amounts of man years we spend deciphering the ones and zeros by simple clicks on a computer screen. Too much time spent on something can drive some people to the very edge of insanity. So close to it that it no longer makes any sense. Not even in the slightest bit of clarity.
If you look at these 10, obvious, cases thinking -”That could so be me!” then you are truly in need of help. A lot of help!
WARNING: Pure Awesomeness Ahead!
Buckle up and hope for the best!
1. World of Warcraft
Do you play WoW (World of Warcraft)? Do you frenetically try to gain those extra gold bars in order to win that epic sword auction at the dwarf’s underground city? Do you crave it so much you skip a few hours of sleep just to get it. Well, in all fairness, you are safe and seemingly human. If your desk however looks like this…SEEK HELP!
2. Star Wars
So you watch Star Wars. You have seen it seeminglyendless amounts of times. You know Princess Leia’s bloodline down to her great great great grandparents birth location. You know better than to ask why George Lucas created those pre-quals that took a legendary concept into the sandbox only to be destroyed by fumbling CG artists that obviously should stay a few years in school. That’s OK! You’re in the clear of healthy. However, do you dream of making out with a Storm Trooper? If you do we suggest you call the nearest psychiatrist to schedule a session, like yesterday.
3. Doodle
Do you doodle when you are talking on the phone? Do you do those swirls and elaborate patterns only an absent and out of sync mind could ever think up? There are sure to be a science behind the doodles most people draw when stuck in a task and the only enhancing past time tools to be found around you is a pen and a pile of papers. No worries, you are absolutely normal doing it. However, if you find yourself doodling and by the end of that call your recently clean sheet of paper now looks like a drawing by Leonardo Da Vinci, then clearly you have too much time to spend and maybe you should also rethink your line of work.
4. Marathon
No restraints. No musts pinning you to the screen of your computer, You simply type away, play your favorite game or even just doing a bit of research for you school project. Sure thing can take a little longer than expected and by all means, things never seem to turn out exactly like you have planned when working with computers in the first place. You spend about 5-6 hours in front of the computer daily. No worries, you are the average. You are the norm in today’s society. However, when things start looking like this around your workstation maybe it’s a wake up call for you and you probably haven’t changed your underwear fro about three weeks! GET HELP! (Just a side note…where is the keyboard and mouse!!)
5. Summer
The birds are twittering. It’s getting warmer outside and you can feel the springtime in the air. Feelings all messed up in a favorable good way. Thoughts wonder off to the sandy beaches of the summer and you start thinking about how to take work with you outside into the freshness. Today’s cell phones or mini computers is a great way to accomplish the same tasks necessary to get that oh so important paycheck delivered to your very mailbox. All normal. However, if you find that your love for the ole stationary computer is far to great and you do just everything to get to stay at it’s side. We suggest you cancel your electricity and start living! Get A Life!!
6. Nintendo
The NES, legendary for its groundbreaking arcade feeling. Nintendo outdid themselves with that console for sure. The games were straight forward and in most cases super addicting. We’re sure that no one can even remember how much they spent on Super Mario Bros. when it came out. It was simply the best game ever. All categories.Yeah yeah, so you like playing Nintendo. You’re in the clear. The average person have at least once in their life seen or played Super Mario Bros. However, when your surroundings start looking like the largest academic library of Washington DC you probably should turn up your blinds and smell the coffee. (A side note…the banner hanging in the ceiling is just too hilarious. “You Better Get Them Before They Get You!” – In our eyes this person is already caught and way past that. LONG AGO!”)
7. Daytrading
You pride yourself by being able to sit at home day trading stocks till your eyes bleed. Every cent is important and you excessively use Excel documents to work out your profits each day of the week. Sometimes even hourly. An extra set of monitors make it easy to spot any new trends in the markets depending on the daily volume. You have full control over the madness going on in front of you on the screen second to second. All good! Congratulations to you! You are self made. However, when you start re-designing your living room into some twenty first century command center headquarters things have gone a little out of hand and it’s time for you to let go. REALLY let go. For your own good!
8. Action Figures
The endless endings you can create when playing with these puppets of men is just amazing. Their arsenal of gear is outstanding and in some cases pure ludicrous. If you have one really unique action figure consider yourself a lucky collector. Some of these wannabe heroes can be sold for quite a hefty price. Enough to actually buy yourself a life. A real one. But no worries. As kids we all wanted them and most of us played with them for hours. You’re perfectly normal. However, when your room starts looking like the plastic version of the sixteenth chapel you should probably start looking for someone to tell you to get out more. If you till have any REAL friends left.
9. Power of Flight
Humanity have long wanted to dominate the skies. To feel the almost gravity free reliance of wings just like the birds. Countless flight simulators have been released for the average gamer that wants to try out their wings. To become the ultimate Red Baron of the sky. There are even joysticks to give you that extra realistic feeling. Buttons and nobs, relays and screens. You fanatically dream of controlling that aircraft yourself. Perfectly alright. There’s many with you. However, when you find yourself buying gear to build your own home flight simulator worth about as much as a real flight certificate. Well, then you should probably seek help. FAST!
10. Beer
Beer, the essence of life for many. The choice of drink at any sports event and bar for every after work pub visitor. We all more or less like beer. Some save the lids while some recycle the bottles like the good humanitarians they are. Pouring up beer in many countries are considered an art and to master it takes years. Fanatic you might say. Not at all! It’s actually what every average person would say. So you’re among the norm. However, when your hallway starts looking like a weird art piece at a surrealistic vernissage it’s time to get worried. Or rather, it’s time for you to GET A LIFE!
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Shortly I came across an mp3, titled the “Virtual Hair cut”, and believe me I was bewitched by the level of hearing illusion.
